I hate cell phones.

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Jul 012011
 

I hate cell phones. Why does everybody always want me to get one? I have nobody to talk to on a cell phone. The way I see it, cell phones aren’t even phones anymore. They have Internet, some TV, games, text messages, and more. What’s the point of having a cell phone if you’re not going to use it for something good like emergency purposes if you break down on the road or something? It seems like everywhere I go, somebody has a stupid cell phone stuck in their ear or one in their hand doing that godawful practice of “texting.” What’s the point of the whole texting thing, anyway? I don’t see how it makes communication any faster.

On that note, what’s the point of owning a cell phone if you’re not going to use it for what the name implies–a cell phone. I wouldn’t need one handy with me unless my car breaks down on the side of the road and I need to call a tow truck, or if I’m in an accident and I need to call for help. I’m not going to waste my damn money using it to get on the Internet, where I have to zoom in on every little thing just to see something. That’s what I have a computer for. It irritates the hell out of me when I see all of these teenagers walking around with cell phones and whining to their parents because their parents won’t buy them the latest in cellular technology. What the hell do kids even need a cell phone for? I went through all years of school, and so did their parents, without having a damn phone stuck in my pocket at all times. Kids have no purpose for a cell phone other then sending degrading nude pictures of themselves and texting the person sitting right next to them in the classroom.

I’ve actually heard of people who have done away with landline phones in their homes and primarily use cell phones for communication. What an idiotic idea. First, cell phone quality sucks. The sound quality in a regular phone is so much clearer than that of a cell phone. Secondly, most cell phone services have restrictions. What’s with this whole “minutes” business? I know there are providers that offer unlimited minute service, but most people don’t get that. Why can’t I just call anybody at any time and with any amount of time whenever I want? That’s stupid.

Although most people are attached to their cell phones, women are predominantly the sex of the human race that are absolutely addicted to cell phones. It’s mostly young women, ages 13 to 45, but all ages are involved. And don’t get me wrong, a large portion of men out there are stuck to their little handheld abominations, but they’re almost like a drug to teens and women–they go through withdrawal if they are deprived of their precious cell phone. Many women find a man unattractive and a turn off if he does not own a cell phone to dance attention on her 24 hours a day. It’s really a sad state of the human race if you ask me. It makes me wonder how these people even lived their lives before cell phones were invented. Oh well, let them be slaves and waste their time and money, because I will never own a cell phone in this lifetime.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000057782188 Joe Ledoux

    I have to admit, I am a bit offended here. My parents got rid of their landline. They need their cell phones with them 24/7 for work, so why pay for a landline on top of that? Also, I find cell phones to be very important under certain circumstances. I 100% agree with you on how people text about useless bullshit, I do. But the night Matt died, how did I get the news? A call on my cell phone. In fact, if I didn’t have my cell phone, I probably would have fallen asleep and not even known until the morning. I think you tend to overlook the important reasons of having a cell phone. Many need them for business, especially if they go away for work.

    • Anonymous

      Well Joe, this is where you and I disagree. I explained why I think landlines are better in the rant, and I also explained that I do think cell phones are important under certain circumstances–emergencies like car break downs, or perhaps an accident occurring out of the home, and many other legitimate reasons. But I think cell phones as primary home phones is a little over the top, but whatever suits you is fine. I also think most people–especially the young middle-to-high school aged kids abuse them and run up the bills for services they have no use for 24/7, like texting.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000057782188 Joe Ledoux

        I agree with kids abusing it, absolutely. We both have fair points here.

  • Mr. English

    Cell Phones are why more people survive car wrecks. Why do you want people to die in car wrecks?

    • Anonymous

      Apparently, you didn’t actually read the rant to begin with. In the rant, I said “I wouldn’t need one handy with me unless my car breaks down on the side of the road and I need to call a tow truck, or if I’m in an accident and I need to call for help.” That, sir, is one of my exceptions to cell phones. They’re alright if they’re used for something useful, such as an actual emergency. I’m against people who have their ears just absolutely glued to their cell phones. (aka, about half of the population)

  • Tcredbird

    your cell phone won’t save you, sweety. we’re all gonna die. how pathetic you are.
    you’ll probably have your phone pasted to your head with your dying breath, never
    realizing you missed your life and everything and everyone that was right in front of you.

    • Anonymous

      lolwut

  • cellphonefromhell

    I hate cell phones,mainly because I work for a cellphone company in billing and have to listen to Idiots complain about a bill that has valid charges, here is a simple test to see if you are mentally able to have a cellphone. How many minutes peak time do you have per billing cycle?What data coverage do you have?any cellphone can browse {unless blocked},What is your local calling area? What is the out of bundle rate for data and local or long distance calling? promotionals like free call display or a long distance package generaly fall off after a certain time.Nowhere in the service agreement does it say you are to be kept in a cellphone at all times,phones come with 1 year manufacturers warranty, lost phones,tantrums,dropped in the toilet are not the fault of the manufacturer or the cell company. It is your cellphone and not the job of the cell company to babbysit you and your phone.p.s most companys have a system that will let you check the usage of airtime and data.